Today she turns ten. TEN YEARS OLD, people! Elle is now in the double-digits and while she is rejoicing at her biological jolt into pre-pubescent maturity at mach speed 5, I’ll be in the corner of my cluttered closet sobbing into her baby clothes wondering how this could have possibly happened.
I’m not naive, probably just stunned. I’ve been watching this kid pretty closely and taking pictures of every major and minor event (and any other event that is just barely interesting enough to captivate the general public). And so, while I may be in denial about this whole nonsense, I will acknowledge that there are some signs I’ve noticed recently that point to her actually growing up:
- She still lets me kiss her in front of her friends at school, but only if it is just on the top of her head.
- I had the sex talk with her last week because she heard some rumor about speculums. I’m still recovering.
- This child eats like there’s no tomorrow!
- She does algebra.
- Seriously, did you just read that? ALGEBRA!! For chrissakes…
- She washes her hands after using the restroom 98% of the time. 98% of adults I know don’t even do that.
- It was inevitable.
I met Elle and some of her friends for lunch at school today and brought her her favorite: McDonald’s chicken nuggets with a Coke/Sprite mix. To be all celebratory and stuff, I thought the girls would enjoy an opportunity to have some special birthday mini-cupcakes topped with all different kinds of delectably delicious sugar-laden frostings.
AFTERNOON TEACHERS: Please feel free to blame me for their hyperactivity. I will suffer the consequences on Friday night when Elle has three of them over to spend the night and they’re all jacked up on rubber ducky zombie cupcakes and about 5 pounds of candy corn…EACH! Well, let’s not talk about this anymore. I’m exhausted just thinking about it.
(Elle ~ I hope your 10th birthday is everything you could have wished for and more – I love you.)